July 2009
3 posts
And Now... Texting With Chainsaw
Chainsaw: One Dollar Budweiser Selects. Doin' Work down in NC.
Will: Oh Snap, I hope they don't have Olestra in them... Good Luck down there, Get cho self a Southern Bell:)
Chainsaw: What's Olestra? There are 3 smoking hot blonde bartenders, but it's kinda hard being the mac when you are actually the lone creepy guy who's getting loaded on cheap beer.
Will: Ha, That's True! Olestra was that dietary oil that was used in low fat Frito-Lay products. They banned it, because people's asses were exploding.
Chainsaw: I already exploded my ass before I came out.
Will: Good Move, Now explode one of those blonde broads pussies!!
Chainsaw: Will do. Will do.
Will: You watching the Yankees or they got the Braves on down there?
Chainsaw: Yanks, but the signal is a little funny at the moment.
Will: Sounds Hilarious:) Phills got Cliff Lee today from the Indians for practically nothing.
Chainsaw: I think the Mets are gonna trade Omar Minaya for Halladay.
Will: I think he's just what the Jays need to pump them up.
Chainsaw: Did the Mets Play today?
Will: No, rained out. They are gonna play 2 tomorrow in Flushing.
Chainsaw: They are on a little bit of a tear.
Will: Yea, 4 in a row and 6 of their last 10. Those are the kinda #s they need to climb out of that 10 and a half game hole they are in.
Chainsaw: Only 5 and a half from the wild card.
Will: 6, but who's counting... Stay Hot, Mets!
Chainsaw: They only have 2 or 3 major leagers in their starting lineup.
Will: Breaks my heart.
Chainsaw: They defy the odds. There amazing.
Will: "They're"
Chainsaw: Look at the english professor.
Will: Not at all, I'm a dope, but I know where to use certain words... It's simple english.
Chainsaw: Your fans kill anyone lately?
Will: Hopefully some delusional Mets fans that actually think they are gonna be playing baseball and not golfing the first week of October.
Chainsaw: Oooh.
Will: Have fun down there, Don't melt. Call me tomorrow and let me know how yr making out.
Chainsaw: Okay
Will: Do you mind if I blog what we just texted?
Chainsaw: Go ahead.
Will: Sweetness:)
Who's Hungry?
Just in case anyone was looking for a late night snack, I thought you might like to see what gets you the most bang for your buck… and by “Bang” I mean Calories, Fat, Sodium, and Diareah… Cheers!!
11,041 Moons Deep (5th of July)
It is now something o’clock on the 5th of July/
Summer is here and it’s a real bully/
I wanna be everywhere but I’m only one man/
Tonight I will sleep but I want it to ban/
For we are in the hot months and I am so cold/
The stickiness and persperations are ever so bold/
I just want to go crazy like Prince did summer ‘99/
And i’d rather not lay down and fall so...
June 2009
3 posts
Observations: Game 1 of the '68 World Series
Bob Gibson is really sweaty.
I find myself rooting against Tim McCarver, but only for comments he would make 40 years after this game was played.
Holy Shit, Frank Sinatra is in the stands. The on-field reporter interviewed him. “Cards in 5,” he said… Stick to singing, Blue Eyes.
Lou Brock is fucking fast, dawg.
The commentators sound like robots… Maybe that’s...
And Now... A Chat With James
James: Have you heard Bon Iver?
Will: Yea, I have the album and the Blood Bank EP. Kinda slow, but i like it. Good making love/going to bed jams.
James: Yeah, my buddy Craig sent me those albums. Trying to listen at work but I've got the server hum of like 8 machines in here.
Will: Oh yea, it's really soft. It really compliments the way i make love/sleep.
James: Soft & nearly inaudible?
Will: Exactly.
Yea… Get Pumped!